It is, somehow a degrading process.
My body simply doesn’t obey my mind anymore and there’s no godforsaken prayer that can ease the pain. As I walk, even in super slow motion, I can feel my lower belly ripping apart.
This whole situation is draining my energy away and I’m pretty sure that very soon I can’t even walk anymore.
Yesterday morning, as I was leaving home, I looked at my cameras and for the very first time in 8 years I didn’t take any with me.
For the absolutely very first time I felt indifference instead of excitement, tiredness instead of stamina.
I’ve been loosing weight like crazy and let me tell you guys… I’m pretty fucked up mentally and physically.
I’m still waiting for the call from the hospital. If surgery keeps on being delayed I’m afraid I will not be able to work anymore anytime soon.
Things are what they are and I’m no different from an abandoned shoe or a dead seagull. The other me looks at myself with a slightly sad enthusiasm.
I’m sick as I’ve never felt before, I will face surgery (soon I hope), I’m loosing weight… all these ingredients make me a perfect subject for a series.
I don’t want to turn Cooking Film into a lame personal complaints blog so I must get on with the picture taking.
I will start posting new film images soon.
PS: No illness can take away the love for the little and amazing Ricoh GRD3.